I celebrated another birthday today, but because my husband had to work, we had my birthday cake and ice cream at lunchtime, instead of dinnertime. I have just turned 33 and this year I seem to be missing that spark that is always around me. I have been down and depressed, but I guess we all get that way sometimes. I am a great believer in writing in my journal and although I am alone, my husband has left for work and my children are not home from school yet, I enjoy the time to reflect on each new entry.
As I sat pondering what to say that would make this day more special than it actually was, I was drawn away by the peal of the doorbell beckoning me to the door. When I opened the door, an elderly woman stood there. She was very tiny and although I didn't recognize her, she had a homey feel about her as I said, "Hello, can I help you?"
For a long time, the elderly woman said nothing; she just stood there staring at me. Then finally, she said, "I am not sure. I think I am your grandmother."
To say you could have knocked me over with a feather would have been an understatement. I replied, "I don't think so ma'am, as all my grandmothers are still very much alive."
"Oh, I am so sorry, but are you sure," the older woman enquired. I replied, "Yes, I am sure." I was just preparing to close the door when she said, "But, the adoption agency said you were my deceased daughter's child".
My chin dropped to the floor and I just stared at her as if she had three heads. How could this be true? Now I was scared and asked myself silently, what if I was? A million things rushed through my head, and then composer returned and I said, "Won't you come in?"
She did and we sat and talked for a long time. I was going to call my mother, but something kept stopping me. I didn't want to hurt her, she was a wonderful mother, so I suggested to the woman that before I do anything to upset anyone in my family, we purchase a home test kit for grandparents and see for sure that it was true. The woman seemed sincere, but I still needed proof. She thought it a good idea too, as she wanted proof as well.
About a week later, Mary returned and we did the test at home, a cost we happily split. The home test was only $499.00 and included everything we needed and directions on what to do with it for processing. We followed the directions to the letter, and then waited. When the results came in, we learned that yes, Mary, was my blood grandmother. Although I was scared to approach the mother I had known all my life, she was relieved that I finally knew the truth and our relationship has flourished, but now we both had another mom, as Mary seemed to adopt my mother, as if she were her own daughter. Now, we are just one big happy family.
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